Today I pledge…

To try and love myself the way the kids do.

To look in the mirror and not see someone too fat, too short, too boring, too old, too ugly.

I will try and take to heart the kids’ thinking I’m “the best momom” (Lisi’s way of spelling Mama), and feel less terrible that I am not just like so and so who parents differently.

I will stop beating myself up for my past inabilities to produce enough milk to breastfeed.

My ‘failure’ at being able to cloth diaper for more than 5 months.

My being overweight – Which I pledge to start working on today. From now on.. no more eating out more than once a week.

I will try and take to heart how my oldest, who is a pre-teen, actually thinks of me. Which brings up a short conversation we had in the car one day.

Outside of the elementary school was parked a rather nice dark blue mini-van with a bumper sticker “I used to be cool.” She wasn’t sure what it meant, and I told her that most people feel uncool or “are” uncool after they have kids. She said the words that I am surprised could come from the mouth of a moody pre-teen, “I think you’re cool.”

So darn it… I’m cool, in my own quirky little way.. I am cool.

Somehow, the girl who rolls her eyes at me while I dance around her all Gangnam Style says that I’m cool. I’ll hold her to that!

I also need to pledge to work on my homework more, and hate my classes less. There is one class that is entirely “work at your own pace” and guess who doesn’t even have the book yet? If you said me, you deserve a cookie.

No, Pocky. You totally deserve Pocky, because Pocky freaking rocks my socks.

Well not that peanut one, it wasn’t very good. :/

 

As part of my pledge to be happier:

I am going to buy clothes that fit.

I am going to take care of myself.

I will eat fruits and veggies more.

I will cut down on the fast food, because since Aussie came home we’ve had waaaaaaay too much of the stuff! Yikes!

I will smile more, stress less.

I will start making the kids lunches more, because I miss doing Bento’s,

I will do more art for me, instead of just art for assignments.

I will push myself to be out there more, instead of withdrawing as I have been.

I’ll pick up the phone right now, and call about that van I’ve been looking at. Because… one of the doors has fallen off one of the hinges on mine. -_-; Yay old stuff.

 

I think, for now… this is a start. I want to keep a log of my diet progress too. So I hope no one minds me getting all on that here 😛

Hope the weekend was good minna-san!

I get to go get the kids in a few hours from the ex-h, and maybe get some yummy Asian stuff from one of the many markets in Spokane.