The upcoming shift in reality

Well, our reality anyway.

As excited as I am for my Australian fiance (aka Aussie) to be moving here in one weeks time… I’m scared. Like each visit where there was some long delay there are butterflies in my stomach and my nerves are unsure of how to act.

I wonder at times, ‘is this what an arranged marriage feels like?’ Yes at times those in such relationships don’t know each other at all, but I know there are some where they know each other casually. Though 9 weeks total isn’t not knowing each other at all, nor is it really knowing each other in person all that well either.

Though I am sure we’ll manage just fine. I’m excited, I’m hopeful, I’m giddy.

But oh am I scared.

I still have so much planning to do. So many paper stars to make, lanterns to buy, the location to look over.
We’ve decided to hold it in the (currently closed down) restaurant part of the bowling alley and bar that my parents do Karaoke at a couple of times a week. Yes, Dad is a DJ and does Karaoke. <3

There will be Karaoke, Bowling, and drinking only for those who want to go to the bar and actually purchase alcohol. As I don’t intend to serve it… The two times I’ve ever drank so much that I’ve gotten drunk and then ill… I never want to repeat. I don’t feel like I need to drink on my special day, aside from maybe some punch or something else. Yeah… maybe I’m strange.

Would you like to see what we’ve decided for our wedding outfits?

This is mine, well not this exact one.. because I am larger than that dress model… but I will be having this as my dress. It’s so beautiful! <3

And Aussie will have this, aside from the fact that the dark blue velvet that you see will actually be a light purple velvet to go with our wedding colors. He wanted a white tux, but I wanted something a little more… awesome. Thankfully we have similar tastes in outfits! Because he loves it! IT comes with pants too.. and I can’t wait to see him in it on our special day.

We’ll also be having lots of candy for our wedding buffet. White, Purple, Pink and only one gold candy. Why only one? Because it’s either going to be chocolate gold coins (for good fortune) or gold covered Andes mints (yummmy!) because they look like gold bars. I thought since the gold is more of an accent in our outfits.. it can be more of one in our buffet too.

I have to wonder if these feelings are ones people have had before. Having to live a world apart from him for all these  years (almost 4) has been difficult. Though now that it’s almost over and this is for keeps, I am shocked and scared on top of the excitement and happiness.

It’s such a strange whirlwind.

Of course it doesn’t help that mom had to bring up that he’s never lived in a country where his accent (aussie yeah..) will be considered sexy. Meaning I may have to worry about him cheating on me or something??? D: I have no idea.. but it wasn’t what I needed to hear a week before he comes here.

It’s not that I don’t trust him, it’s that… it’s difficult to explain. It’s hard to trust other people with your husband and I know that human beings can be vulnerable to so many different things…

Bah!

I am over worrying things… to maybe an extreme.

Tonight is his last  night in his current home. Tomorrow he heads out to go spend time with family for almost a week before travelling here, and then… he’s all ours in body as well as he has been in heart and spirit.

I can’t wait, I’m tired of a lonely bed. I know I last saw him the day after my birthday (the day he left from his most recent trip) but that was over 5 months ago at this point, and it was a year the time we saw him before that.

Well, enough with me for now. I hope everyone enjoyed getting to see our wedding outfits!