I couldn't just leave it alone.

Wednesday I got to see my niece Sarah. In fact, I got to do more than SEE I got to snuggle, hold and let her fall asleep while she sucked on one of my finger tips for comfort. I was in love. All of 6 days old she’s precious, squeaky and cute. How can I not want to snuggle her?

I had to leave because I was supposed to have been running errands, but I had to remind myself over and over again ‘no more babies!’

——

Yesterday.

I’d been drooling over Dremel’s at Lowes for a few minutes. Deciding to check online for a better price despite my sudden urge to buy a bunch of tools and build a bunch of things.

Why am I telling you that? Because I want to build the scene darn it! 😉

Walking through the parking lot is usually mindless, watch for cars, hold Lisi’s hand, get to the van, let’s go.

But then “What’s that? Oh nooo…” My ex’s voice as he stops behind us and I turn, he tends to do that when we see a dead animal on the road. I try not to look usually because it makes me sad.

Still, this time I look with sadness growing “oh the poor baby…. wait!” I swear I can see movement, just a little! Breathing! I can  see it!

“No, no don’t! Aw nooo…” he sighs as I gently scoop the baby up in my hands.

“What? I can’t just leave it here to get squished by a car!” I protest, looking to make sure I wasn’t seeing things. No, there is movement, a small twitch on top of the breathing.

“You’re going to have to wash your hands,” he frowns. “Besides, it probably wont make it.” Thank you for being pessimistic, but I know that. Really I know that.

“I… I know…” I whimper, trying not to cry at the poor little baby held in my hands, I cup it gently to keep it warm. “Do you think… the vet is still open?”

The vet doesn’t seem very hopeful, but doesn’t bother with a full out appointment. Instead she says that if I want to try, kitten milk from an eyedropper every 2-3 hours is my best bet. I’m teary eyed the entire time, of course I want to try!

Off to the pet store, and then a different one because the first doesn’t carry what we need. The entire time I’m not getting much more than the occasional weak twitch, and the breathing movements from it. I’m still not sure the gender at this time, or if I’ve got a mouse or a rat in my hand. I don’t care. It’s a baby, it’s in need and I just can’t say no. I have to try.

Feeding it perks it up at least a little, at home I situate an old plastic not really tupperware container into a small nest for it. Complete with a worn out sock, and some shredded paper towels to snuggle down with. Washing my hands carefully and any thing else I’ve managed to touch is Clorox wiped down.

By its second feeding it’s energetic, able to move in my hand and actually try and get the food from the dropper if I accidentally move it. The next feedings go even better, and signs of life perk up as squeaks come from the plastic container (with holes in the lid of course) when it’s around time for food. I’m left being up every few hours at night to actually feed it.

I don’t care too much, other than feeling tired at the broken sleep. It sleeps with it’s container on top of a my heat pad set on low, because I know it’s not able to produce its own heat.

It was this morning after the 11:10 feeding that I realized it. Waking up for feedings, cleaning it down with a warm paper towel, making sure it’s warm enough but not too hot. It is a baby. One I just told myself I didn’t need the other day. No more babies right? Well, no more human babies.

It seems the universe decided to answer my body’s twinges for something cute and little by way of … making me almost step on this teeny little thing sleeping in the container on my paper drawer to my right. All I can do right now is pray that it (I wish I knew the gender! It seems a little uncaring!) lives at this point, and provide the best care I can.

By now, we’re pretty sure it is a baby rat. I am guessing maybe a feeder someone bought a container of from the pet shop, and this one got away. I don’t see any signs of injury, as it appears to be walking just fine for all the walking it can do.

Its eyes are still not open and I have no way of really knowing the age.

Want to see Squeakers eating?
Of course you do! 😉 This was taken about 12:45AM this morning. @_@